The 7 worst kinds of college admission essays

Don’t find your latest creation on this abbreviated list of the worst-of-the-worst, published recently by The Huffington Post. Go here for the original slideshow and all the details.

The worst part about them? They’re predictable.

The Cringe-Inducing Metaphor Essay. (It’s not insightful. Just lame.)
The Reformed Convict Essay. (What on earth makes you think an Oprah-worthy confession of bad-boy behavior in high school will absolve you of a low G.P.A.?)
The Mother Teresa Essay. (You’ve helped other people. Nice. Next?)
The “Wizard of Oz” Essay. (You say you finally realize that everything you need is in your own backyard? They read: Safety school. Not inspiring.)
The” Jersey Shore” Essay. (Writing that the person you most admire is some schmuck celebrity isn’t clever — just misguided.)
The Dead Dog Essay. (Essays about your coping with the death of a loved one aren’t inspiring. Just sad.)
The Free Verse Essay. (Now is not the time to disregard instructions and just write what you want. It just shows you can’t follow instructions.)

About the blogger

Alex Friedrich

afriedrich@mpr.org

Alex Friedrich reports on higher education issues for MPR News. Among the stories he has covered: the fall of the Berlin Wall, aftermath of Hurricane Katrina, collapse of the I-35W bridge in Minneapolis, 2003 Moscow suicide bombing and 2004 presidential elections in the Republic of Georgia. He holds a bachelor’s degree in journalism from the University of Georgia and a master’s in European political economy from the London School of Economics.