Timewaster: The milk sommelier

The dairy industry in these parts is in rough shape. Milk prices are low and there’s too much of it.

What the industry needs is a little more snootiness.

It needs a milk sommelier.

Milk tap rooms are next.

  • Rob

    Pronounced sah·MOO·yea

    • Al

      Okay, I am actually laughing out loud at my computer.

      • Rob

        : )

  • Zachary

    Excuse me, what do you recommend for this bowl of Cheerios I’m having for breakfast? Should I go Skim, or Whole? Do you have a nice jug of 1% for the whole table?

    • Jerry

      Heavy cream

    • “What pairs well with Oreos?”

      • Zachary

        everything

      • Zachary

        have you tried any of those new flavors yet? any good ones, or ones to stay away from?

        • Gary F

          Thumbs down on Peeps flavored Oreos. I’ll take the off brand tray with three flavors myself.

          Or were you talking flavors of milk?

          • Jerry

            The grainy texture of the filling is really off-putting. It feels like you’re eating sand.

          • Gary F

            Ground up clay pigeon targets in the Halloween ones, that’s what makes them orange.

          • Zachary

            Oreos. Those peep ones just sound nasty to start with.

          • Gary F

            I didn’t buy them, there is a Peeps lover in my home and its not me.

  • Gary F

    I used to know a guy near Frederick WI that only milked Brown Swiss and Jersey, he scoffed at Holstein milk.

    Nothing beats milk right out of the bulk tank. Holstein or Brown Swiss.

    • Jerry

      Swiss has a higher butterfat content

      • Gary F

        Once I told him that I had an uncle in Stearns country that milked Holsteins, he never let me forget the finer attributes of the Brown Swiss and Jersey.

        I also got to see the guy come over with the long rubber glove. So there!

        • Jerry

          Wait, are trying to out-farmer me?

          • Gary F

            I have lots of farm experience for growing up a suburban boy.

            I’ve ringed pigs, pealed gizzards, round baled, square baled, picked eggs, cut corn out of bean fields, cut thistle out of oat fields, and read Wallace’s Farmer’s magazine.

            Dad’s side of the family were dairy farmers in Stearns county and mom’s side of the family were cattle/hog and corn/bean farmers in eastern Iowa.

            I’d love to own a John Deere 2020 but not sure I could drive it in St Paul.

          • Rob

            Just put a hemi in it and take it to the MSRA’s “Back to the ’50’s” show at the MN State Fairgrounds

    • Rob

      Totally horrorshow!

  • D.Robot

    Time to revisit “Napoleon Dynamite”… With the line “This milk tastes like the cow got into a garlic patch”, after he tastes somevery yellow looking milk. Ugh.