College professor Sylvia Lopez lets loose on her freshmen in a USA Today blog post:
1. Why do you always ask me what we are doing next lecture if it’s right there in the syllabus you are holding?
2. Do you really think I’m blind and can’t see you blatantly texting underneath your desk?
3. Are those iPod earbuds surgically attached to your ears t hat you can’t take them BOTH out while I’m lecturing?
4. When I say that the assignment must be typed, and you turn in a handwritten hard copy, do you think that I really said, “The assignment must be typed – IF YOU FEEL LIKE IT”?
5. Are you prejudiced against staplers? Will it kill you to staple your five page paper before you turn it in to me?
6. Why do you constantly ask me what your current grade is when I give every assignment back with the points tallied on the front? Add them up!
7. Did you know that every time you ask “Is this going to be on the test” you add an additional test question to your midterm/final?
8. Do you see the sign at the edge of my desk that reads, “Turn off cell phones and NO texting during appointments”?
9. Did you know that asking inappropriate questions in class actually subtracts participation points from your grade? You do not earn points for asking just ANY question.
10. You have the right to a dictionary, if you cannot afford a dictionary one will be provided to you for use. Do you understand this statement and will you promise to use a dictionary the next time you turn in a paper to me?