Good morning, everyone. I hope you have a fine day.
From the Department of 12-Step Programs, Gaming Division…
A new study says that nearly one in 10 American children who play computer games are pathologically addicted.
Boys spent an average 16.4 hours a week playing games and girls 9.2 hours. “Addicted” gamers played 24 hours a week, twice as much as casual gamers.
Welcome to the New American childhood. However, one might fault the researchers for citing the following criteria:
The most common symptom was children skipping household chores to play games.
From the Department of Fitness, Animal Division…
Check out the pipes on the new Detroit Lions logo. I suppose that when you are responsible for the first ever NFL franchise to finish a season 0-16, you pull out all the stops… by hiring a slew of graphic designers.
“We stand firmly committed to improving the team on the field,” team president Tom Lewand said. “That success is always the most determinative factor of any NFL brand.”
Good news, buddy. You’ve got nowhere to go but up.
From the Department of Fitness, Brain Division…
If you enjoy Scrabble a little too much, you’re going to love DeepLeap.
From the Department of Nothing Could Possibly Go Wrong, Division of James Bond Movie Plots…
Thank goodness the company’s CEO public stated that the patent was just an attempt to “cover their bases,” you know, in case we ever need a giant, space-based, hurricane-busting laser.
From the Department of Awesome, Division of Automobile Service and Repair…